Honouring the Memories of a Brother - Rememberance Article about My Late Brother - Lalson

  

On15^th September, just after midnight (around 00.30 am), my mobile phone started to ring. I was at bed and knew that it was an overseas call. Usually I never take those calls, because my friends and family overseas knew that I live in a different time zone and I like them to respect my time zone. But it started to ring again. I picked up the phone to hear that shocking news – my younger brother Lalson (36) had a silent cardiac arrest and he is no more. He was my only sibling and was working and living in Bahrain with his wife and two young children.

I couldn’t believe. I called Fr James at the Cathedral (a friend priest from Kochi, India) to come to Calwell presbytery and to verify the news. He verified the news. I cried. We did an “office for dead” at Calwell presbytery chapel.

It happened after lunchtime at Bahrain and was evening in Kochi. I instructed not to break this news to my aging parents that night and managed to get into a flight to Kochi. It was the most difficult thirteen hours of plane journey in my life. I prayed that my sister-in-law gets enough courage to bring Lalson’s body from Bahrain to Kochi, with his children. I reached on same day evening and the funeral was planned for next day evening.

When the news broke, it was devastating for my parents. My mother had to be taken to the hospital.

According to our customs (Syro-Malabar Catholic rite), the first part of the funeral ceremony is celebrated at the family house and then the body is taken to the church and then to the cemetery. It is more of a personal and communal event. There were around 1500 people gathered for the funeral including more than 50 Carmelite priests and nuns. It was an honour for me to officiate his funeral ceremony. But I could do it only with extra-ordinary grace and courage from above.

An official memorial service was conducted on the 7^th day of death, according to our tradition. The Syro-Malabar curia bishop – Mar Bosco Puthur officiated that Memorial Mass and it was followed by a solemn vegetarian lunch (Sadya) for all 600 special invitees.  I remained with my parents and the family of Lalson for the next 30 days, listening to their stories, sharing our grief and observing a fast with abstinence of non-vegetarian food and entertainments.  I officiated a Holy Mass on the 30^th day with my family and close relatives to mark the end of that fasting period.

A very special thanks to the parish community and Frs John and Peter who supported and prayed for my family and me all throughout these difficult times. It helps me to find new meaning in the mysterious ways of the plan of God in my life.

• Published in the PM magazine of Corpus Christi parish, Tuggeranong, ACT, Australia

New Year 2012 – Reflections

 

The past year was a kind of mixed bag - the Arab spring and end of dictatorships in many countries were mixed with global economic woes, centered-round Europe. Our personal life stories many not be too different. This time is the best time to reinvent the ancient Christian spiritual tradition of “examination of conscience” - to take stock of our deeds and actions. Let’s find out some time to sit and relax, may be at the beach side (weather permitting!) and to look back and evaluate our life – both materially and spiritually.

It’s also a time to look forward and to make new resolutions. We may have dreams and wishes, like “I want to pass my exams this year”. But a resolution is bit different where I would say that “I will devout an extra hour everyday for study to pass my exams”. January 1^st is also the feast day of Mary - the Mother of God, who was prepared to put her efforts to realize that title.  Luke chapter 2 verses19 and 51 show us how she “treasured the word and pondered it in her heart" to respond concretely to the plan of God in her life. She not only said “Yes” but also was ready to corroborate it with actions, which we will see all through out her life – till the cross at Calvary and the Upper House with disciples.

Year 2012-13 is called by Australian bishops’ conference as “Year of Grace”. Wish you all a grace-filled New Year. 

Publish in the Parish Bulletin of Corpus Christi parish, Tuggeranong, Canberra, Australia

Christmas Homily 2011

Christmas Homily 2011

It’s Christmas and a little story for you. Once there was man in Europe who was decent, gentle and generous. But he felt Christmas as a lot of rubbish. “The whole business of Incarnation where God becomes man sounds crazy, it doesn’t make any sense to me”, he told his wife, who was a faithful churchgoer. It was Christmas eve and he wasn’t a Scrooge. So, he allowed his wife and children to go to midnight Mass. Soon after they left, it started to snow – it was a perfect white Christmas! But suddenly he heard some shattering noise at the living room windows. It was a flock of birds huddled miserably in storm, searching for shelter and trying to fly through his window. He felt sympathy – “after all it’s Christmas, I should help them.” He remembered the barn where the children’s pony was stabled. It would provide them a warm shelter. He went outside, opened the barn and invited the birds to come in. They wont come. He started to do all the tricks – switched on the light, put a trail of breadcrumbs, shooing them into the barn – but wont work. He was devastated. “I wanted to help these bloody ignorant birds” he said himself, “but they don’t get it.  “And I can’t seem to think of any way to let them know they can trust me. If only I could be a bird myself for a few minutes, perhaps I could lead them to safety. . . .”

Just at that moment the church bells rang- the Christmas Mass. He stood silent for a while and then he sank to his knees in the snow. “Now I understand,” he whispered. “Now I see why You had to do it.”

And that’s why He did it – the Emmanuel – God is with us – so that we may understand, and be led to safety – for our salvation and for us to know the mind of God and to touch his kindness in human form. Now we got a model and example before us, who can perfectly communicate God to us.  And God communicated Himself to us by being a part of family - father, mother and a child – Joseph, Mary and Jesus.. That’s why Christmas is a family celebration and also Christmas is a celebration of “family”. That’s the reason why we are supposed to enjoy a beautiful Christmas lunch with our family and friends around. Hope you all will have good time with Christmas gifts and Turkey tomorrow/today!

Let us also not forget the tiniest (and most insignificant) of our human family as we share Christmas joy with our dear and near ones. Let’s make sure that every child in our families gets a chance to be born from the very moment of conception in his/her mother’s womb, as Jesus could be born into our world. Let’s make sure that every child gets the warmth of a family with a father and a mother ensuring complimenting dimensions of parenthood, as Jesus was blessed with a family. Let’s make sure that every human being gets an asylum if they run away from persecution as baby Jesus did from King Herod and not to be perished in the sea.

 And after all JOY is putting J and O before Y. That is, Jesus, Others before You! Let’s allow Jesus to take the center-stage in our lives. Let’s love him – he is very cute in that manger on the crib and also in our hearts. Let’s also love others and put their needs before us. Let’s overflow our humanity with Christmas gifts to the marginalized and the poor – we could give generously to the Archbishop’s Christmas Appeal for charity today or to Vinnies or Caritas or others. By bringing JOY to others and ourselves, let’s join the party of Jesus’ birthday. Merry Christmas and safe travelling!

• With inputs from: http://www.frtommylane.com/homilies/years_abc/second_sunday_after_christmas-2.htm, http://www.munachi.com/z/christmaseve.htm

• Delivered at Corpus Christi parish, Tuggeranong, Canberra, Australia